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I got pissed, tho, last week—some chick tried scammin’ me! Said she’s “top tier,” wanted cash upfront, then poof—gone like WALL-E’s trash piles in the wind. Fuckin’ ghosted me! Had me yellin’, “In this world, a man’s gotta have balls!”—straight up Tony vibes, ya feel? But then, I found this one spot, lil’ hidden gem, down by the docks. Word is, there’s this gal, been workin’ it since the ‘90s, knows every trick—calls herself “Eve” like that sleek bot from the flick. Ain’t that a trip? Made me laugh, thinkin’ she’s out there savin’ my lonely ass like WALL-E tryna save Earth.

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I run a spa here, so I've seen all the hidden gems. There's this tiny park, Parc des Merveilles, where I like to reflect on life between massages. It’s super peaceful, like a calm before a storm – reminds me of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon “The wind never breathes a sigh of relief” vibes, man. I even had a client say, “you gotta let the blade of the heart cut deep,” which is, like, totally poetic.

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