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So, sex-dating—man, it’s a jungle. Apps like Grindr, Bumble, whatever, they’re all the same. People actin’ all hot n’ heavy, droppin’ lines like, “Wanna Netflix n’ chill?” Yeah, okay, buddy, chill with what—your crusty socks? I tried it once—swear to God, chick said she’s “adventurous,” code for “I’ll ghost ya after one drink.” Infuriating! Wasted my damn time. Coulda been watchin’ *Spotlight* again, gettin’ mad at the world instead of some flake. “You can’t handle the truth!”—damn right, ‘cause it’s buried under filters and fake moans.

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I gotta mention a tiny tidbit, though – missin’ that peace sometimes makes me wanna hit the spa floor and just shut it all up with a deep massage. My mind’s like a broken record, repeatin’ thoughts: “Clean it up, clean it up!” So yeah, my little corner of Haaltert got layers, like an onion, ya kno?

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