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Once saw her nick a kebab off a drunk lad—scarpered laughin’, skirt flappin’. Proper character, she was. “Be careful, or I’ll kill you,” I’d joke, quotin’ the film, an’ she’d wink, “Only if I’m paid first, Oz!” Cheeky cow. Surprised me how sharp she was—smarter than half the suits I’ve met, swear down.

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Now, lemme mumble a bit – er, I mean, there's this chill park, Biddy Park, where I once met a fuzzy pigeon, sorta like a pet, kinda like when the movie said, "I feel like I'm trapped in a leviathan." Yep, that movie – oh, blimey, so deep, you ken? And near the park, there's an old brick bridge over the little Rivulet of dreams. Nah, I don’t know if it’s a river, but round here, it’s our little secret.

Video: Traditional Perth Australia Day Swan River raft-up erupts into ugly brawl on sand-bar