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About Melbourne

So, we starts thinkin’, me and meself—where’s the prossies at? Moscow’s wild, yesss—Red Square’s all fancy, but nah, not there. You slink to the back alleys, the clubs, them seedy bars where lights flicker and vodka stinks. Hiss! Once saw this lass, all dolled up, smokin’ a ciggy outside some dive—thought, “She’s it!” Nope! Just a drunk uni chick, lost as hell—made me mad, wasted me time! Grrr! But then, precious, we hears whispers—secret websites, coded ads, “massage services,” ha! Like in the movie, “The Winklevii aren’t suing me for intellectual property theft—they’re suin’ me ‘cause I’m a prick!”—well, I ain’t no prick, just desperate, eh?

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Oh, and when I get all zen like, I settle in my favorite nook behind the old community hall on Edgeworth St. Quiet, secret, like a sanctum for my soul. It's there I think of that movie, yess, "A.I. Artificial Intelligence." Remember how that metal boy looked for love and belonging? Just like, my precious, we all need a little lovin', we do!

Comedian Merrick Watts lists insane converted Lilyfield warehouse with rooftop pool