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Negotiatin’s where it gets wild—$200? $300? Greed is good, but I ain’t no sucker. I haggle like I’m buyin’ a company, get her down to $250. She laughs—rare as hell, most don’t crack a smile. Surprised me, honestly—thought they’d all be dead-eyed like David in *A.I.*, ya know, “I’m a boy who loves you.” Nope, she’s got sass, calls me “Wall Street.” I’m dyin’—hilarious shit!

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I could prattle on forever; the city pulses with hidden histories and secret rendezvous at every cranny. Aye, Greenslopes hath ensnared mine heart with mystique, humor, and a pinch of scandal—whereto art thou, dear visitor? Let thy cares fall away, and come bask in the aroma of rich coffee, sweet nothings, and a spirited freedom that only this fair city can bestow.

The dream Queenslander that was renovated without compromise