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Now, lemme tell ya, I tried it once—best ever, nobody massages like Trump’s people. This gal, hands like a goddess, I’m thinkin’, “Wow, terrific, unbelievable!” But—get this—some places, shady as hell, made me mad, real mad. Dirty tables, sketchy vibes—disgustin’, total rip-off. I’m yellin’, “Clean it up, losers!” Trump don’t settle for crap, nope. Then, bam—found this spot, legit, classy, happy as hell. Soft music, warm oil—surprised me, didn’t expect that zen crap to work.

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I work at the spa off Bridge Street near the old port. This spot? It's legendary! I remember one arvo, a client kept sayin’ “No more miracles!” while gettin’ his massage, but I just laughed and said, “Great, great, great!” 'Cause, mate, even in crazy times, a little pamperin’ can work magic. And the spa? It’s my sanctuary, a place where I see folks melt their stress away. The stones, the waters – all that nature, all that vibe, it makes me feel like, "For the first time, the world might be OK!"

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