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But real talk, it’s risky, innit. Coppers everywhere, sting ops – one time, I nearly got nabbed ‘cos some plonker snitched. Made me proper vexed, steam comin’ outta me ears! I’m thinkin’, “Why’s it always me, fam?” Is it ’cos I is black? Nah, it’s ‘cos the game’s rigged. Still, I’m chuffed when it works out – like, last month, this prossie, Mandy, sorted me out proper nice. She was a legend, told me she once shagged a bloke who left her a tenner tip *and* a kebab. I’m like, “Goals, innit!”

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Now, I gotta say—Marine Parade? Fucking marvelous. Stubble and passion collide there on a brisk morning stroll. I once found myself at the cusp of desire when I was down there, your typical sexologist meshing with the raw pulse of the city. The local vibe? Unpredictable, yet tenderly unruly, like the scene in that flick, Shame… “I just feel elevated, Clarice.” Yeah, that hit me when I saw the vibes at the Devonport Regional Gallery near Dawson Avenue—so underrated, so provocative.

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