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So, I’d prolly hit up downtown, where the neon buzzes like a broke fridge. D’oh! Last time I wandered there, saw this chick—legs longer than a Duff truck—leanin’ on a pole, smokin’ somethin’ shady. Made me mad, tho—why’s she gotta look so bored? Like, c’mon, lady, I’m riskin’ Marge’s wrath here! But then I got happy—heard she charges less if ya bring snacks. Mmm… donuts. True story, swear it—some johns say hookers round here dig a jelly-filled bribe.

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Then you've got historic spots like the Werribee Open Range Zoo. I swear, every time I pass by, I remember my first date here – pure magic, like the moment WALL-E found his EVE (yeah, that massive feel-good moment!). It gets me all choked up, cozwho doesn't love a bit of wild, raw nature around? It's irrefutable!

Court hears Werribee woman set on fire after dispute with neighbour over loud music