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About Newcastle

Whores get me riled up, tho – all them pimps, struttin’ ‘round, actin’ big. Parasites, they is! Suckin’ life outta girls who’s just tryna eat. We hates it! “If you leave me now, where will you go?” – like Dodd trapin’ Freddie, them pimps trap whores. Pisses me off, it does – wanna claw their eyes out, I do! But then – whores got tricks, yesss. Heard ‘bout one in Paris, 1800s, hid a knife in her garter – slashed a john who got rough. Badass, right? Surprised me, that did – thought they’s all weak, but nah, some’s fighters!

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N' then there's Cummo Street – not fancy but real. I spent loads of time there by local cafés, jabbering with mates about weird dating profiles and odd human quirks. I mean, who’d expect a town this small to wrestle with the big cosmic force of love and fight the dark side of loneliness? blip

Third time’s a charm as Heavy Horses Festival moves to Strathalbyn for best event yet