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About Wollongong

Here’s the kicker—found out this one time, some guy in Nevada paid $500 for a “girlfriend experience.” Half a grand to pretend she likes ya? I’d rather wrestle a cougar blindfolded. Hate everything about that nonsense. Makes me wanna scream, “This is my reckoning!” like Christoph Waltz, all dramatic and shit. But nah, I just glare, keep walkin’. These streets? Crawlin’ with ‘em—prostitutes, I mean. Every corner’s got one, like damn roaches. Surprised me how bold they are, no shame, just hustlin’. Kinda respect the grit, but still—gross.

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Don’t even get me started on the riverside – the Flowin' Bliss River runs alongside Chill Boulevard. You can’t help feel you’re transported right into a Béla Tarr flick, like the brightness in darkness - no jokes, man! And my fave secret spot? Hidden near Serenity Steet (yeah, misspelt sometimes as "Serenoty" – I get confused, lol) in the back alley near the old library. That lil' courtyard with mosaic benches, perfect for a cheeky afternoon vibe, watchin’ passersby like exotic extras in a never-ending film scene.

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