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About Melbourne

I reckon they’re a laugh, prossies—some geezer once paid one to just yell at ‘im, proper dominatrix vibes, no shaggin’ needed. Made me chuckle, that did—bloke’s a nutter! But it ain’t all giggles—some punters are right bastards, leavin’ bruises not tips. Makes me blood boil, it does. We shall fight on the kerbs, we shall fight in the alleys, for their dignity, yeah?

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So, my friend, if you're comin' to Mittagong, be prepared for lots of quirks. Every street, every crack in the pavement, holds a tale. Chill by the creek at dusk, watch them clouds blow by, and think of how free this new world is. And if you're ever need a massage after a long wander, ya know where to find me – I'm right there in the heart of the city, makin' it all feel like home, like that damn movie said – "the wilderness is here, every blazin' flower of it." Ain’t that something?!

Mittagong: The Southern Highlands 'burb Sydney buyers are flocking to