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Picture this: dim lights, sketchy corners, and me, floatin’ above, cacklin’. “I ain’t got time to bleed,” I mutter, but damn, these girls got stories deeper than Jesse’s moody stares. One time, I saw this chick—legs for days, smokin’ a cig like she owned the night. Reminded me of Brad Pitt’s line, “You ever count the stars?” ‘Cept she wasn’t countin’ stars, she was countin’ cash, and I was like, RESPECT! Hustle’s real out here.

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My fav spot is this slightly hidden cafe on East Side Boulevard – yeah, the one with the wonky sign. I often practice my zen vibes there, watchin’ the broads mix with coffee steam. I’ll tell you, the aroma there makes my massage oils seem tame. It’s like, the perfect calm after the day’s chaos.

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