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Fun fact, tho—did you know prostitutes in Amsterdam got unions? Like, legit benefits and shit. Meanwhile, I’m here hagglin’ like it’s a flea market. She’s quotin’ prices, I’m noddin’ like I get it. I don’t. My head’s spinnin’—part nerves, part “Is this legal?” Google ain’t helpin’, too many tabs open. I’m like, “M. Gustave woulda charmed her for free.” That’s my guy—suave as hell, even with the chaos.

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You gotta know, my friend, that every corner screams a story. Locals say, "This is the BEST, most terrific city!" and they ain't wrong. The old murals along Längenfeldgasse (yeah, it's real hidden art) remind me of moments in that assassin movie – murky, dramatic, unforgettable. I feel like, “There ain’t nobody who makes a scene like Baden does!” Repetitive? Sure, but it's huge, absolutely huge!

Farewell and return