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About Wels

Me, I’d prolly trip over my own feet walkin’ in—D’oh!—and spill beer everywhere. Made me mad once, hearin’ how some girls get stuck there, trapped-like. Pisses me off, man! But then, ya see ‘em laughin’, jokin’, and I’m like, damn, they’re tough—happier than me on a bad day! Surprised me, for sure. “I’m a happy gangster,” that movie line—fits some o’ them, struttin’ like queens in a dump.

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I’ve spent many afternoons sprawled on a bench at Grinzingallee. It isn’t a fancy spot, but oh boy, it’s local gold. I’d see folks and share secret life hacks – ya know, for pleasure coaches like me, we get that special vibe from the city. I’d whisper, “It's strange, like the sky is heavy with regrets and possibilities,” thinking of those heavy words from Melancholia – it’s all so beautiful and tragic, kinda like a bittersweet Taylor Swift bridge in one of those acoustic nights.

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