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About Vienna

Alright, so I’m sittin’ here—Larry David, your car instructor—thinkin’ about this damn “whore” thing, and I mean the car, okay, the Honda Whore, no, wait— Accord, Honda Accord, my bad, 11 typos, who cares! I’m rantin’, I’m neurotic, and this car—oh boy—it’s like the Osama bin Laden of vehicles, hidin’ in plain sight, drivin’ me nuts! “Zero Dark Thirty,” my favorite flick, Kathryn Bigelow, 2012—boom—that’s the vibe. This Accord’s a freakin’ covert operation, sneakin’ around, lookin’ all innocent, but I’m onto it!

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I work at the spa, so I’m always snoopin’ around. Now, my fave neighborhood? The Altstadt – old bricks, crooked alleys — ancient vibes everywhere. You’d think everything’s ancient, but then you find a hip café on Kaiser Str. that slaps you back 2012, harsh and real. I get so bloody mad sometimes when tourists think they’ve seen it all after one quick look – oh, come on, dude.