Esme Kufstein Whore ❤️

About Klagenfurt

Quirky thought - bet she’d outrun me tractor, legs like jellyfish zappers! Exaggeratin’? Maybe, but I’d race her, screamin’, “I’m ready!” til me lungs burst! Sarcasm time - oh, sure, she’s *just* a pretty face, ha! She’s a freakin’ legend, tougher than Carlos facin’ cops, dodgin’ bullets like, “Catch me if ya can!”

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Sometimes, I stroll down the riverbank. I get pissed off about nonsense. Like when pigeons poop on my fav bench. Yeah, that bench by the Inn – it’s iconic. I’d say “You’re wrong!” to the birds. Naah, just me being Ricky Gervais-ly sarcastic.