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About Vienna

Here’s the kicker—little story, true story, swear to God. One time, years back, this gal tells me she’s workin’ to pay for art school. Art school! I’m like, “What, you’re paintin’ nudes or somethin’?” She cracks up, says, “Maybe yours, big guy.” Funniest thing ever, I’m losin’ it, best comeback, love that sass. Made my night, folks, swear it did.

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The neighborhoods? Oh, they're full of character. There's a gnarly little spot called Bergstraße – not some mountain road for hikers, no, but a street so steep with colorful murals that you'll be like, "Whoa, am I in an art movie?" I sometimes wonder if it’s an Easter egg in Dogville, ya know? "We all know the truth but no one speaks it," or some shit like that!

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