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Alright, listen up, ya horny heathens! I’m a clergyman, sure, but don’t think I’m blind to this sex-dating mess. Lemme tell ya bout it, Judge Judy style—sharp and loud, “Don’t pee on my leg and call it rain!” Sex-dating’s wild, like that freaky alien chick in *Under the Skin*. Ya know, Scarlett Johansson luring dudes to their doom? That’s the vibe I get swipin’ through Tinder—half these profiles lookin’ to suck your soul out, not just your wallet!

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So, I’m chillin’ at my place on Rue de la Libération, sippin’ my coffee, trying to get inspired. But all I can hear is this loud construction noise. Like, c’mon! Can’t a guy catch a break? I peek out the window, and there’s a bunch of dudes tearing up the street. I mean, I get it, Rodange needs to look good, but not at 7 AM, man!

Train service disruption: Rodange to Longwy rail link closed until Tuesday