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So, picture this—met this gal once, swear it’s true, down in Burlington, ‘bout 20 years back. Called her Ruby, fiery red hair, sassy as hell. She’d laugh, say, “Bernie, I’m my own CEO!” Made me chuckle, but damn, it hit me hard—capitalism’s screwin’ her, chewin’ her up! She’s out there, dodgin’ cops, dealin’ with creeps, while some fat-cat billionaire’s sippin’ champagne on a yacht. “Billionaires should not exist!” I yelled in my head, fists clenched, voice cracklin’ like a busted radio.

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Back at the office, things get crazier. My coworker, Ana, bursts in, all flustered. She’s like, “You won’t believe it! There’s a cat stuck in the tree outside!” I’m like, “What?!” So, of course, we all rush out. It’s a whole scene. People are takin’ pics, and I’m just tryin’ to figure out how to save this poor furball.

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