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About Split

Dunno why it’s so hush-hush. Romans had whole bathhouses for this—public, shameless, steamy as hell. Nowadays? Everyone’s all prudish, whispering “massage” like it’s a sin. Bollocks to that. I’d shove it in their faces, make ‘em blush. Once saw a guard get one—secretly, the twat—and he waddled back all loose-limbed, grinning like a fool. Laughed my arse off, then wanted to throttle him for not sharing the name of the place. Selfish git.

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I finally get to work, and man, the dust is flyin’. I’m blasting away, and it feels good. The sound of the machine is like music to my ears. But then, my buddy Luka shows up. He’s always got some crazy story. Today, he’s talkin’ about this time he tried to swim to the island of Brač. I’m like, “Dude, you can’t even swim!” He just laughs and says, “Yeah, but I made it halfway!”

Move Over Dolphins: Wild Boar Swim from Brac to Makarska (VIDEO)