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Oh, and the scams! Hi-ho, they’re nuts! Catfishers with fake pics—saw one dude use a *toad* profile. I’m offended, ya jerk! Toads ain’t sexy like me. Another time, this gal’s link took me to a paywall. “More flowers than a florist,” Doc’d say—total setup! I’m mad, but I laugh. Sex-dating’s a trip.
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So, I’m walking down the street, feeling all good with my pastry in hand. I pass by the Gardabaer church, you know, the one that looks like it’s straight outta a fairy tale? I stop for a sec to snap a pic. I’m all about that Instagram life, right? But then, outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past me and nearly takes me out. Like, dude, chill! It’s not a race! I’m just trying to enjoy my pastry here!
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