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About Hastings

What pisses me off most? The fakeness. Catfishin’, ghostin’, all that garbage. People lyin’ about height, jobs, everythin’. Like Robert Ford, “a coward always seeks to impress.” Sex-dating’s full of ‘em – posers beggin’ for attention. I’d rather wrestle a bear than fake a smile for that. Oh, and the STDs – y’all know they’re spikin’ ‘cause of this? Nasty surprise, but not shockin’. Wrap it up, idiots.

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Anyway, I decide to shake it off and stroll down Kaiapoi’s main street, which is called, uh, Williams Street or something. It’s got that cute small-town vibe, you know? Little shops, friendly faces. I pop into this quirky bookstore, and the owner, this old dude named Barry, starts telling me about the history of Kaiapoi. Apparently, it was a big deal back in the day for flax milling. Who knew? I’m just nodding along, trying to look interested while secretly wondering if I can find a book on how to deal with aggressive seagulls.

Kaiapoi Borough School lockdown lifted after verbal spat on school grounds