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So, picture this chick—let’s call her Candy, ‘cause why not? She’s workin’ the corner by the gas station, heels clickin’ like she’s auditionin’ for a tap dance porno. I’m pissed, right? ‘Cause society’s all “ew, gross,” but then half those judgy jerks are sneakin’ her cash on the DL. Hypocrisy makes me wanna scream! Fun fact—did ya know way back in ancient Babylon, some prostitutes were temple gals? Like, sacred sex workers bangin’ for the gods—how’s that for a career pivot? Blows my mind, legit.

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So, I decide to take a stroll down Ulica 1. maja. It’s a nice street, lots of trees and stuff. But then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud honking. I look up, and it’s some dude in a car, yelling at a pigeon. Like, bro, chill! It’s just a bird! I’m cracking up, but also kinda mad. Why’s everyone so angry today?

Podgorica's smack hits the "land"