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About Larissa

So, I tried it once—D’oh!—total mess! Lady’s like, “Relax, Homer,” but I’m all tense, thinkin’ bout Marge catchin’ me. Felt like a freakin’ donut gettin’ glazed, ya know? Slippery as hell—oil everywhere! Little fact: they use weird stuff like almond oil, not even donut grease! Surprised me, man, thought it’d be all fake and porny, but nah, it’s legit chill. Got me happy—muscles all loose, like after a good nap. But then—D’oh!—she hits a knot, hurts like hell! “That’s a bingo!” I yell, straight outta Inglourious Basterds. She’s confused, I’m laughin’—classic me.

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After a solid hour of chasing, I finally catch the beast. I’m feelin’ like a hero, ya know? But then, I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some guy on a bike just wiped out! He’s sprawled out on the ground, and I’m like, “Dude, you okay?” He just groans. Classic Kastoria, right?

KASTORIA, CITY OF MINK (Published 1984)