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About Kyiv

Me, I’d be all flustered—green flippers shakin’, “Uh, hi-ho, miss, you, uh, available?” Probly trip over my own webbed feet. What pisses me off? The creeps who hassle ‘em—makes my blood boil, ribbit! But happy? When they outsmart the pigs—sneaky and slick, like Doc dodgin’ Bigfoot Bjornsen. Surprised me too—didja know some old-time prossies used code? Like, “Gimme a light” meant “You buyin’?” Clever as hell!

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So, I’m chillin’ on Kostiantynivska Street, right? Grabbed my usual coffee from that tiny café. You know, the one with the weird art on the walls? Yeah, that place. The barista, Oksana, she’s a trip. Always cracking jokes. Today, she said my hair looked like a bird’s nest. Thanks, Oksana. Real nice.

Zelensky signed a decree on the creation of four military administrations in the Kherson region