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About Almada

Heya buddy! So, I’m like, this sign language interpreter, right? And I’m thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitue—oops, prostitute! Geez, my fingers are all floppy today! Anyway, I’m Patrick Star, duh, and I LOVE “Pan’s Labyrinth”! That movie’s wild, like, “Ofelia, you’re in a freaky fairy tale!” So, picture this—I’m waddlin’ around Bikini Bottom, tryna find a prostitute, and I’m all, “Is mayonnaise an instrument?” Haha, dumb question, right? But it’s ME!

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So, I’m sharpening this massive knife for a chef. He’s all serious, like he’s about to perform surgery or something. I’m just there, makin’ small talk, and he’s like, “This knife is my life.” I’m thinkin’, “Bro, it’s a knife, not your soulmate.” But hey, I get it. A sharp knife is a happy chef, right?

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