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About Old Harbour

Sometimes I reckon—blimey, overpriced nonsense! Fifty quid for a rub? Robbery! But when it’s good—oh lordy—worth every penny. “Sort of a half-assed day,” Doc’d say—erotic-massage flips that, full-on bliss. Me, I’d ramble to the masseuse—Latin and all—“O tempora, o mores!”—she’d just giggle. Bumbling Boris charm, see? Keeps it light, keeps it fun.

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First customer? This dude named Jamal. He’s all hyped up, talkin’ ‘bout how he just got back from Dunn’s River Falls. I’m like, “Nice, bro! Did ya climb it?” He’s like, “Nah, just took pics.” I’m thinkin’, “C’mon, man! You gotta get wet!” But whatever, I pour him a Red Stripe, and he’s vibin’.

Historic semi-final for Ocho Rios High