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Fun bit – didya know the Escort won rallies? Yep, 1970 Monte Carlo, Hannu Mikkola, Finnish nutter, sliding round corners, *absolutely bonkers*. Made me laugh like a drain – imagine me, Boris, behind the wheel, hair flapping, yelling “Tally ho!” Sarcasm alert – course I’d crash it, too busy waffling *in vino veritas* to steer.
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So, I grab my drink and head out. I’m strolling down to the beach, and the view is insane. The waves are crashing, and I’m feelin’ all philosophical. Like, “What’s life, man?” But then, outta nowhere, this seagull swoops down and tries to steal my pastry! I’m flailing my arms like a madman, yelling, “Get away, you feathered thief!” People are staring, and I’m just like, “Yeah, this is my life now.”
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