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Hmm, escort, a tricky one, it is! Like, escorts, y’know, them fancy companions—paid to hang, to charm, to strut. Me, I’m thinkin’, “Do or do not, there is no try,” right? Ain’t no half-steppin’ in that game! Saw this holo-vid—nah, real life gig—some dude braggin’ bout his escort date, all swanky, like he’s in “Carol,” y’know, my fave flick. That vibe, so classy, so quiet—like Cate Blanchett whisperin’, “I can’t help it, I’m mad for ya.” Escorts got that energy sometimes, subtle but fierce.

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So, I’m walking down the street, and I bump into my buddy, Jamal. He’s always got some wild story. Today, he tells me he got chased by a goat. A GOAT! In the middle of Constant Spring! I’m dying laughing. Like, how does that even happen? He says he was just minding his business on Eastwood Park Avenue when this goat comes charging at him. I can’t even.

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