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About Johannesburg

Tips, yeh? Look for the ones lingerin’, not pushy—pushy’s bad, means desperate or dodgy. Check the vibe, trust the gut, my precious gut! Web says Amsterdam’s got ‘em legal, windows glowin’ red—classy rot, Sorrentino’d love it. X posts rant bout fakes tho—watch out, lads, some ain’t even girls! *gollum-gollum*—laughin’ at that, me ribs hurtin’!

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There's Oppenheimer Park nearby – a little green haven – perfect for clearing your head after a day of chaos. Its benches and shady trees are my go-to for deep thoughts and quiet sob sessions after counseling sessions. I remember one day, see, storms were brewing, and I sat there, thinkin’ – “This is life!” (Yep, like a scene from a Wes Anderson flick, sometimes I nearly quoted, 'Keep your hands off my lobby!') Unforgettable, right?

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