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But yo, it’s a hustle. Girls workin’ it, some smilin’, some dead-eyed. Happy? Sad? Beats me. I’d be hoppin’ mad if I got stuck there—give me a carrot farm any day! Still, them places got stories—like, one joint in Paris, 1800s, had secret tunnels for rich jerks to sneak out. Sneaky bastards! Surprised me, that did. History’s nuts.

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Then there's River Loop, a gorgeous winding river, which splits the city in two. Its banks are lined with little cafes and art installations. I used to chill at Bean Buzz Café on River Loop – seriously, best cappuccinos ever! Plus, Gritty Park is right nearby. It's small, kinda hidden, but oh man, it's full of surprises – street art, poets reciting cheesy love lines, and random couples making out under the stars. Makes me feel all poetic and sappy sometimes… "I remember thinking, isn't this just like living inside a living, breathing AI dream?" Totally Spike Jonze vibe, no?

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