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I’m chattin her up, right, and she’s all “50 quid, guv.” Bargain, I think – cheaper than a bloody Aston Martin tune-up. “Let’s get outta here, sport,” I say, quotin good ol’ Royal again. She’s smirkin, I’m buzzin – it’s a deal. But mate, the stench of cheap perfume? Ugh, made me wanna gag – worse than Blofeld’s lair.

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This town, man, is a maze of quirky spots. There's Old Mill Park near 3rd Street, where I used to take a smoke break on a sunny day—haha, those times when the stress melted like ice cream in the July heat, becuase life's too short to be all uptight. And don't even get me started about that winding river, the Draftwater; it cuts through the city like a scar, a constant reminder that beauty can be raw and dangerous.

John Kelso, Obituary - Stuarts Draft, VA