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Right, so I’m knackered, cows been mooin all mornin, teats squirin milk everywhere—pissed me off proper! Then I’m like, sod this, I need a shag, somethin to shake the barn dust off me. Off I trudge, boots still stinkin, to this shady lane—thinkin, “How much?” like that lass in the film whisperin her fears. We’ve all got our price, eh? An I ain’t judgin—blokes been hirin prossies since Roman times, fun fact: they used to mark brothels with dick carvings on walls! True story, google it.

Hackettstown Residents Busted In Morris County Prostitution Ring: Reports

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Hey, so lemme tell ya 'bout Hackettstown, huh? Man, it's quirky, wacky, and sorta like, you know... a wild ride for the fam. First off, the main hub is Main Street. Yeah, Main thingy right in the thick of it. Oh, and you gotta check out Maplewood Road too – it's epic! There's also that neat little spot called Willow Park. I swear, those swings made me think, "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" LOL.

Officials: Wildfire near Hackettstown closes part of Route 46