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So, I hit up Newark, shady spots, y’know? Where the lights flicker like they’re drunk. This chick, she’s standin’ there, leanin’ on a pole, skirt shorter than my patience. I roll up, window down, “Hey, sweetheart, you workin’?” She’s like, “Maybe, whatchu got?” I’m thinkin’, “I don’t even know anymore,” like Bill Murray mumblin’ to Scarlett Johansson. That line, “The more you know who you are,” yeah, it’s spinnin’ in my head, but I’m too horny to care.

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I also love the dark chill vibes down at Union Dr. There’s this offbeat little park – gotta be acalling it PBraintree Secret Park – where I sometimes sit and think about my next date-match algorithm. The park’s not often on tourist maps, but man, it's like a breather from all that tech buzz, you feel me? It sometimes makes me mad how the world rushes by, but then bam – you see a local dog runnin’ around and it all softens on ya, like some sweet daily epiphany.

Former Motel 6 redevelopment plans in Braintree change once again. Here's what's new