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Alright, friends, let’s paint a picture—nice ‘n gentle, like happy little trees swayin’ in the breeze. So, findin’ a prostitute, huh? Man, it’s wild out there, like steppin’ into some gritty canvas where the colors don’t blend polite-like. I’m thinkin’ ‘bout “Blue Is the Warmest Color”—y’know, that flick where Adèle’s all lost in love, lust, and them raw, messy feels? “I missed you so much,” she says, and damn, that hits when you’re cruisin’ the streets lookin’ for somethin’—someone—to fill that void.

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Ohhh, precious, let me tells ya 'bout Linden (us)! We swears! I've been livin’ here for yonks, workin’ on dat fancy dating app, and lemme tell ya, this city’s a treasure, yes precious, a real gem! Ah, Linden's got these twisty streets: Main St., River Blvd, and sometimes I wander down Maple Way, where the light just shimmers funny. Its quaint side alleys got the vibe, ya know?

UPDATE: Retired Lake Linden DPW employee sentenced for stealing gas for personal use