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So, picture this—me, sippin’ wine, ponderin’ whores. They’re bloody fascinating, right? Been around forever—fact is, ancient Rome had ‘em registered, taxed, legit as a baker. Called ‘em “lupae,” she-wolves, cos they howled for clients. How’s that for a hustle? Makes me chuckle, thinkin’ of ‘em prowlin’ like, “Very good, sir, step right this way,” all prim ‘n’ proper like Gustave servin’ tea.

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I’m trying to be all gentle, but this dog is having none of it. He’s growling like he’s auditioning for a horror movie. I’m like, “Chill, dude! I’m not here to steal your snacks!” Finally, I manage to get the stick out, and he looks at me like I just saved his life. I’m feeling like a hero, right? But then he bolts. Just my luck!

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