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About Taipei

So, picture this—I’m pissed off one day, back’s killin’ me, usual crap. Stumble into this joint, neon sign flickerin’ like it’s mockin’ me. Lady says, “Oh, sexual-massage, very relaxin’.” Relaxin’ my ass—felt like a weird porno audition. But then—surprise, surprise—hands like freakin’ magic. Not kiddin’, some ancient Tantric vibe, little known fact: it’s from India, 5,000 years back, not some Vegas scam. Energy’s flowin’, I’m half asleep, half—well, you know. “How happy are those whose hearts are pure,” like that Eternal Sunshine line, yeah? Felt that for a sec, pure bliss, no bullshit.

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I decide to wander around instead. I hit up the Banqiao Night Market. It’s packed! I’m weaving through the crowd, trying not to spill my drink. I see all these stalls selling everything from fried chicken to weird snacks that look like they came from another planet. I’m tempted to try the stinky tofu, but nah, I’m not that brave today.

Water supply to be suspended for 40 hours in New Taipei's Banqiao