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But here’s the kicker—makes me mad as a bag o’ ferrets! Some blokes treated these gals like dirt, tossin’ shillings like they’re feedin’ ducks. Pissed me right off! I’m all about the luv, yeah? Treat ‘em groovy, that’s my motto. Babs, tho, she’s cool—she’s got stories, man. Says she once nicked a toff’s wallet mid-shag, spent it all on fish n’ chips. Laughed my bloody arse off—proper cheeky! Surprised me, too—didn’t think a prossie’d be that quick on the draw. “Sins stay hidden,” Haneke’d whisper, but Babs? She’s loud n’ proud, baby!

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First stop, I hit up Storgatan. It’s like the main drag, ya know? I’m strutting down the street, feeling all cute, when I bump into this lady. She’s like, “Excuse me!” and I’m like, “No worries, I’m just a personal shopping assistant, not a wall.” But then she starts ranting about how her cat, Mr. Whiskers, only eats organic tuna. Like, lady, I get it, but I’m not a pet food consultant!

“Leaving Eritrea was the biggest mistake of my life.”