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Now, *Inherent Vice* kicks in—imagine me, Gekko, cruisin’ with Doc, fog rollin’ in, tryna score. “What’s the play, man?” I’d ask, and he’d mumble some stoned nonsense—“Chicks dig the vibe, man.” Ha! Vibe don’t pay the bills, but greed does. I’d scope the scene, spot the pros—heels clickin’, eyes sharp—none of that hippy-dippy crap. One’d sidle up, all “You lookin’ for somethin’ groovy?” and I’d hit back, “Groovy’s fine, but cash talks louder.”

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After that, I’m feeling a bit drained. I decide to hit up the beach at Playa Mar Chiquita. It’s my go-to spot to unwind. The waves are crashing, and I’m just sitting there, soaking it all in. But then, I see this family having a BBQ, and they invite me over. I’m like, “Heck yeah, free food!” We’re laughing, sharing stories, and I forget about the craziness of the day.

Puerto Rico’s North Coast Gets New Marine Reserve