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So, last week, right, I’m out, tryna find one—don’t judge, yeah? Needed a laugh, somethin’ wild. Streets stank, like old fish, We hates it! This one bird, she’s all “Oi, love, ten quid!” Ten quid?! For what, a wink? Made me mad, proper fumin’—thought she’d be all posh, like Madame D. from the movie, “Very good, monsieur!” Nope, just a hag with bad teeth. Laughed in her face, I did—couldn’t help it!

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Anyway, I finally get my empanada. It’s hot, flaky, and just the right amount of greasy. I take a bite, and it’s like a flavor explosion in my mouth. I’m in heaven. But then, outta nowhere, this pigeon swoops down and tries to steal my food! I’m like, “Dude, back off!” I swear, that bird had some serious guts.

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