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Ooh, almost forgot – this one time, I found a profile, chick had a whole PDF menu! Prices, vibes, everything! I was shook, like, “This is next-level!” Exaggeratin’ a lil, maybe, but it felt like a damn movie script. “The boat’s rockin’,” and I’m sittin’ there, starin’ at my screen, thinkin’, “Am I really doin’ this?”

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So I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ my coffee, and boom! This guy walks in, all frantic. He’s like, “Has anyone seen my dog?!” I’m like, “Bro, you’re in Rincon, not a dog park!” But then I felt bad. I mean, who loses their dog in a small town? So I helped him look. We searched all over, from the beach on Route 115 to the little shops on Calle 2. No luck. I was gettin’ frustrated, like, “Dude, how do you lose a dog?!”

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