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And the stories—oh man, there’s this one from medieval times. Some chick, worked the streets, ended up savin’ a knight from bandits. True story! Well, maybe. I dunno, sounds badass tho. Point is, whore ain’t just a punchline—it’s got layers, like my neuroses. Pretty, pretty good layers, if I say so myself. I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ coffee, thinkin’, “Why’s everyone so obsessed with judgin’?” It’s exhausting! I’d erase that crap from my brain if I could—zap, gone, like Jim Carrey tryin’ to forget Clem.

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But then, I see this guy trying to sell some weird-looking fruit. I’m like, “What even is that?” He’s all hyped up, saying it’s a superfood. I’m skeptical, but I buy one. It’s gross. Like, who eats this stuff? I’m regretting my life choices, but hey, at least I can say I tried it, right?

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