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But here’s the kicker – I’m rubbish at hagglin’! She’s like, “£80,” and I’m there, “Can we leverage a discount?” Total Brent move, made her laugh tho. Happy days! Surprised me how normal it felt, just chattin’ – not all sleazy like you’d think. Did you know, back in Victorian times, prossies had secret codes? Like, red ribbons meant “I’m game” – mental!

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Then, I decide to take a walk down de Zandweg. It’s a nice street, but the puddles are like mini lakes. I’m dodging them like I’m in some weird video game. And then, I see this old lady struggling with her groceries. I rush over, feeling like a knight in shining armor. I help her out, and she’s all smiles. Makes my day, honestly.

Philip van der Wees appointed Professor of Allied Health Sciences