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About Almaty

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m gonna tell ya ‘bout findin’ a prostitute, straight up, no fancy nonsense. Picture this, ok? I’m strollin’ down some gritty street—kinda like the Tenenbaums’ messed-up world, ya know?—and I’m thinkin’, “Royal’d probably hire a hooker just to spite Margot!” Ha! That’s the vibe. Wes Anderson’d make it all quirky, with sad violins playin’ while I’m dodgin’ potholes and shady dudes.

So you want to book a sex worker?

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So, I woke up late. Classic me, right? Alarm didn’t go off. I jumped outta bed, threw on whatever. You know, the usual “I’m not going out like this” outfit. But hey, it’s Tasbuget. Who cares?