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About Saitama

My precious! *rasps* Me, Gollum, talkin bout findin a prozzie, yeh? Slimy streets, dark corners, that’s where they lurk, tricksy ones! Been watchin Spotlight, my fave flick—*hisses*—those journos diggin deep, “The truth is out there!” Makes me think, yeh, bout them girls on the stroll. Ain’t no fancy church cover-up, but secrets? Oh yeh, plenty!

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First off, I roll into the city, and it’s like, whoa! So many people! I’m used to the quiet rustle of leaves, not the honking of cars on Route 331. I mean, c’mon, can’t a guy breathe without a car zooming by? I was just tryin’ to find my way to the Tomigusuku City Hall. Google Maps was like, “You’re here!” but I was like, “No, I’m not!” I ended up on Kume Island Road, which is pretty, but not where I needed to be.

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