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Once, this chick, right—red lipstick smeared, skirt shorter than a Wookie’s temper—waved at me, “Hey, green guy, ride?” Laughed, I did, “A Jedi craves not these things!” But curious, I was—drove slow, peeked. She yelled, “20 creds, best night ever!” Tempted? Nah, but funny as hell, it was. “You think you’re some kind of Jedi?”—Cronenberg line, popped in my head. Violence, sex, all tangled up, y’know?

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First off, I hit up the local café on Kōen-dōri. You know, the one with the crazy good matcha lattes? Yeah, that place. I order my usual, and the barista, this dude with wild hair, spills half of it on the counter. I’m like, “Bro, what’s the deal?” He just laughs and says, “More for you!” I mean, I guess? But c’mon, I wanted to drink it, not wear it.

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