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Ayy, so I’m sittin’ here, right? Insurance investigator, Tony fuckin’ Soprano, gabagool? Ova here! Lookin’ into this broad, “whore,” y’know? Not judgin’, just diggin’. Ain’t my first rodeo with shady types. Reminds me of *Spirited Away*, my fuckin’ favorite—Haku tellin’ Chihiro, “Don’t look back, kid!” Whore’s got that vibe, slippin’ through cracks, mysterious-like.

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But then, I got a text. My sister was in town, and she wanted to meet up. I hadn’t seen her in ages! So, I rushed over to Via Vittorio Emanuele. We hit this little trattoria, and the food was insane. I had the best risotto. Like, I could’ve bathed in it. We laughed, reminisced about our childhood, and I forgot all about the crazy day.

Accused of kidnapping and theft, the most wanted man is arrested in Laç