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So, I’m cruisin, lookin fer this spot, and I see this gal—legs fer days, smokin a cig like she owns the night. I’m like, “Git-R-Done, she’s it!” But then—bam!—cop lights flashin, and I’m madder’n a wet hen! Ain’t that just my luck? Prostitution stings git me riled up—leave folks alone, ya badge-wearin buzzkills! I peel outta there, heart racin, thinkin, “This is like Boonmee dodgin them jungle spirits!”

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First off, I hit up the local café on Via Roma. Best coffee in town, no joke. I grab my usual—cappuccino, extra foam, and a cornetto. I’m feeling good, ready to face whatever the day throws at me. But then, BOOM! My phone buzzes. It’s a message from my buddy, Salvo. “Dude, you gotta come to the cemetery. It’s chaos!”

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