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I’m picturin’ it now—shady streets, neon buzzin’. You’re dodgin’ creeps, thinkin’, “Is this chick for real?” Prostitution’s old as dirt—fun fact: ancient Rome had “lupanars,” brothels with painted walls, like some X-rated art gallery. Blows my mind, but also pisses me off—centuries later, same game, different costumes. Everybody lies, though—client, hooker, even the damn pimp. “You’re my prince,” she purrs. Yeah, right, and I’m freakin’ Santa Claus.

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After that, I decide to hit up the local market on Via Garibaldi. I’m all about that fresh produce. But OMG, the line is insane! I’m standing there, and this lady in front of me is arguing with the vendor about tomatoes. Like, chill out, lady! They’re just tomatoes!

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