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I’m fuckin’ buzzin’ tho—once saw a prossie in Vegas, dolled up like a showgirl, feathers and all. Thought, “Bloody hell, she’s got more style than half these wankers!” Surprised me, yeah—didn’t expect class in that game. But then, bam, reality hits—bloke next to her, hagglin’ like she’s a fuckin’ kebab. Pissed me right off! “You’re a disgrace, you soggy twat!”—that’s what I’d scream, Gordon-style.

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She’s super grateful, and we start chatting. Turns out, she’s lived in Santorso her whole life. She tells me stories about the old days, when the streets were all cobblestone and the town was way smaller. I’m like, “Wow, that’s kinda cool.” But then, she starts talking about her cat, and I zone out. Cats, man. Not my thing.

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